The Biggest F*@k in My Life

It was time to get out of Kampala. During the week leading up to Easter, I asked a man who cut in front of me at the grocery store if he was stupid. When he assured me he was not, I proceeded to call him a series of words that would make an etymologist blush. On my walk home, I boldly asked passive starers on the roadway, “What the fuck are you looking at?” Walking through my front door, I yelled at the neighbors’ abandoned barking dog innumerable times to “shut the fuck up”. There were a lot of fucks in my life. Continue reading

The Ambiguity of the Ugandan Legal Code

Everything is legal in Uganda. Want to snort coke off of a prostitute’s back as you club a baby elephant to death? Go right ahead. To be fair, this act is illegal (when done in combination) due to the obvious fire hazards. However, it magically becomes a legally-sanctioned activity for (and I’m absolutely just guessing here) $20. In Vegas, you have to spend at least 20 times that—and you don’t get to choose the elephant.

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